There is a space between myself and my thoughts, and in that place, I observe with curiosity.

I’m aware of the patterns and loops; the fixations and stories. Rather than automatically believe them, what I’m striving to do is pause, notice the mental habit, and remind myself that a thought isn’t a fact or an accurate representation of reality.

It’s not helpful for me to believe a mental construct, often created by my ego to serve its needs.

And when comparative criticism starts to creep in, I interrupt the process and ask myself if I’d want someone thinking that way about my daughter. Taking that approach further, I remind myself that everyone has a child inside, and I think about that child’s fears, needs, and feelings.

This practice of pausing, observing, and replacing judgment with empathy helps to open my heart.